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Episode 37 – Photography Sales with Jennifer Hennigan

Photography Sales with Jennifer Hennigan

Watch the full episode here.


In this episode, Julie interviews Jennifer Hennigan, an entrepreneur, boudoir photographer, philanthropist, and sales coach. She shares her tips for how she incentivizes her clients to put more money down upfront, how to educate your clients on what’s included in a photo session and how to create a steady workflow for sales.

Watch the full episode here.

About Jennifer: 

Jennifer is an entrepreneur, boudoir photographer, philanthropist, and sales coach. She is also an author, and an improv performer based in Austin, Texas. She graduated from Texas State University with a degree in communications and advertising. After two years of working in sales, she started the Eye Candy Boudoir, Austin’s world-famous boudoir studio. As a top boudoir photographer in Austin, Jennifer has had multiple six-figure years, with 2022 being her highest year, thanks to her one-hour workflow sales process, which you can learn more about within her course, the Build Better Client’s Bootcamp. She’s also releasing her first book, Why Your Photographer Hates You

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About Julie Goetzinger:

Schedule your complimentary breakthrough call with Julie today.

Julie Goetzinger is a psychic medium, best-selling author and coach who teaches how to make more money and impact without sacrificing your well-being. In her book, “Free to Fly: Manifest the Life of Your Dreams,” she shares her story of how she created abundance by stepping into her true self as an artist and spiritual medium. She is the creator of Free to Fly and has seven years of experience in business as an entrepreneur.

Connect with Julie Goetzinger: 

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Episode Transcription

I think a lot of people don’t realize how social I am. I was raised Catholic, I was the big kid who never did anything wrong. Even now, people think boudoir, they think sexy, they think Veronica, and then people meet me and it’s like I’m just a really wholesome person. I think a lot of photographers, a lot of boudoir photographers out there, there’s a lot of really good ones with straight morals and stuff, and a lot of people don’t expect that. They don’t expect photographers to be like normal women who have families, some of them go to church on Sundays. It’s funny because I’m single and so I date a lot and I date men that I meet online. When I tell them what I do for a living, I think they have this vision in their heads about me. Then they meet me and they realize, on the first date we’re going to end with a kiss, that’s good, and we’re not going to go further. I think it kind of throws them for a loop, but also our dating culture today is just terrible. 

I relate to you because people used to called me the PG boudoir photographer, because they’re like, “Oh, you just don’t share your risk gay stuff.” I’m like, “No, I just don’t do that because I live by my own morals and I also believe in God and living a life of modesty and I’m the same way. There are a lot of judgments when we tell people what we do. I’m curious how did your community, your friends and family respond when you came out as a boudoir photographer

My mother had the most supportive response when I told her. I was like, “You know, I think I might want to sell boudoir photography.” The first thing she said, I’ll never forget it was that season. But actually my mom is one of my biggest supporters and I always know that she’s just a big supporter because all the gifts I buy her with all the money I make. My mom, she’s very Catholic. We grew up very differently. She was the oldest in a family of five siblings, oldest daughter and she kind of took on, like my youngest uncle would call her mom and they grew up in the country. It wasn’t like the seventies we thinking of, like we think of the fun party seventies. They lived in the rustic country, middle of nowhere seventies, with religion and conservative values. So for her it was just, that’s Jennifer thing. I’m the one who doesn’t mind doing things that are different and fun, and pushing the envelope a little bit. Even though for my own self, like I do have morals and stuff, but my family is very supportive. 

My cousin Kim, who I’ve always looked up to, is almost like a sister. I remember her telling me, “I’m so proud of you and how hard you’ve worked and how successful you’ve become with your business.” That meant a lot to me, because like I said, I always looked up to her. My brother and sister-in-law supports me, but they didn’t really want their kids to know what I did. Once my parents came to Austin one weekend with the kids. They asked me to come back to their house and I was like, “Well, I have to go back to their house and get some stuff.” They were like, “We’ll follow you. We’ll go in there.” I was like, Okay, let me take a nephew down first when I was supposed to know what I need for a living and they’re going to see all the photos of my work and my house. We got in the car, I had my niece, nephew with me. They wanted to ride with me, I’m like, “So, Jenny needs to explain something to you before we get from her house.” I told them what I did. I think they forgot, because I later told my brother and I was like, “I’m so sorry, Mom and Dad brought them. It wasn’t me. It wasn’t my decision.” He responded, “Well, you better make sure that their mother doesn’t find out.” I was like, “Okay, I won’t tell her if you won’t.” 

The way I explain it to my children is, it’s like fine art and that you go to a museum and you see statues of nudes, the body is very beautiful. I had a picture of myself in one suit, it was like a one suit – a bathing suit basically, and my kids looked at it and my son just said, “That’s weird.” He was little when he saw it, but to me, it’s really important that my children do not shame themselves for their body and they see it as beautiful as art and it can be very classy the way you present it. My photographer did an amazing job and I did it right after I got divorced, and it was such a celebratory session of seeing myself as this goddess. It felt empowering and just like, wow, this is how we make people feel, like really important work. I think it’s important that children see too, it’s worth celebrating; our bodies and not shaming ourselves, we all have one, right? 

Absolutely, and there’s a way to do it. Obviously if I had children, they would not be coming in during the assessment, watching mom on these assessments, but they’re going to see things on your computer that you’re editing and you just explained to them. There’s a difference between an adult woman doing something like this for herself. Most of my clients wear more than most women wear to the beach, so they’re covered up. You’re not seeing anything inappropriate, it’s just the way you present that I recently started dating someone, and I mentioned how he thinks that it’s good for children to see bodies and stuff. I’m like, “well, of course my children probably see pictures of my work.” He was like, “Man, I don’t know about that,” yet he was like on the other hand,”If you went to another country and there was like new, and everybody was like, their nude, I personally wouldn’t feel comfortable for my kids to be there.” I much rather see them, see my photos where they’re covered up, but you can still see their body. People have different ideas, I think. I do try to respect my brother and sister-in-law’s feelings about that. I explain to my niece and nephew, “You know these women, when you’re an adult, a lot of women struggle to really feel good about how they look.” What I do to help them see their bodies as the beautiful vessel that God has put them in to live on this earth so that they can feel good about themselves. My niece is eight, I think she got it, and then my nephew was just excited that aunt didn’t take photos of butt. 

Sales Figure in Photography 

I am excited to hear some of your sales tips, how you become a multi six figure boudoir photographer? How did that happen? Did you start out as a high end or did you start charging less and then raise their prices as your talent increased, things like that. Tell me a little bit more about that journey with pricing and sales. 

Starting out, I think I was like, nobody’s going to spend more than $200 on photography, and throughout college and stuff, I would be doing sessions. I stopped the occasional wedding, realizing I never wanted to shoot a wedding again. My photography started at like $120 or $60 for, I think, 16 photos and I went up to 20 for like eight photos, and then I went up to like 160, 300. I thought that’s really good. And then I got my first boudoir business and they got the smallest package and it wasn’t less than $699, and I was like, apparently I didn’t raise my prices high enough. My mom, ever supportive parent, said, “Nobody’s going to spend a thousand dollars on boudoir photos.” I was like, I paid this woman a lot of money to tell me what to charge, and she told me to charge a thousand, and something I’ve learned is if it’s free advice, it’s probably not really worth very much.

Free advice is exactly worth what you’re expecting. That’s one of the biggest things I’ve learned in business. My mom has never run a six figure B Art studio, so do not take her business advice. That’s the best decision I ever made. I love my mom by the way. So I started out at $699, $1,299, and actually for my Black Friday sale, I’ve been considering doing something like a big back to the beginning sale where we charge 18 for a limited number of people. That’s something I’m working on right now. I feel like it would be a great way to get in a bunch of people real quick, especially because I am converting my studio at the end of the year, which I can talk about more later because I want to travel more and I want to make my house to be my house again. I’m making some big changes for 2023. I’m actually going to convert my house studio into just a house. Then book sessions in different states and travel so I can like, write it off, do that, write off thing. 

I eventually started raising my price, and decided to try something. I got my smallest package for $2,200 and then just tried to reward people with a $1,000 first card when they do something I want them to do. I tried that and all of a sudden, it’s like that meme of that girl. In one picture she’s making the “gh” face and then in the other picture, she’s making the “ah” , that’s a good idea. So it’s like, people, when they spend a thousand dollars on boudoir photos, they’re like “ugh” or people when they spend 2,200, but they’re getting a thousand dollars off, they’re like, “Oh yeah, that’s a good deal.” I started doing that and I saw more people happy with what they were spending because they felt like they were getting a lot of savings. The thousand gift cards would convince them to gum bump up to the next package, or that thousand dollars goes to stores like a la carte, not just a la carte by itself, right? That way they can’t try to manipulate that to get free products and not any money. But normally the incentive is to spend at least this much money to get this kind of gift card. My prices currently start at 3,500 and go up to 11,000. 

I tell most of my clients, they come in, we do a consultation in person. I really get them into my domain so I can sell them and pick them in a way that I know is going to work, and they’re really invested because they’re already there, they drove here, they’ve taken the time. I also charge 99 bucks for a normal client for a consultation. It’s like you paid 99 bucks to be here, listen to the whole pitch and really pay attention to everything you’re getting, not just the money. I do a phone call, don’t tell about money or anything. I always say the phone calls like the first date. We’re just talking. We’re getting to know each other. I’m telling you all the good stuff about me. I’m telling you all the things that make me a great person, and yes, I’m going to have my baggage, I’m going to have the feelings that I’m going to need for somebody else. I’m going to need a little bit of a commitment. But I’m not going to reveal all that on the first phone call. I’m like, here’s what we have to offer, all I want is a small commitment from you for a second date. Give me 99 bucks for a consultation and let’s meet up and let’s talk, and we’ll go over all the pricing and product and the whole shebang. If they say no, well then, you know it’s like a date, right? If I’m not worth a second date from coffee to dinner, then okay. Is it in person, the consultation or do it online? It can be in person or it can be over zoom, whatever works best. 

We offer them a thousand dollar gift card, to put more money down, pay off the product, pay off a package, and then we offer finances stuff. We look at what they can afford ahead of time, so we know, okay, this person seems like they’re ready to go. “Oh, I’ll pay out of pocket,” I already know. Then we get a feel what they can afford. I feel they can do this. So let me incentivize them by saying, “Hey, put this much down or do a payment plan before you do this and I’ll give you a thousand dollar gift card and you can pay off this or whatever.” Normally that happens and that way I get more money. I know when I’m working and getting paid. I think a lot of us, myself included, were taught to do all this work up front and then collect the money. I don’t know one photographer who hasn’t gotten screwed over, doing all this work and then someone is like, “Oh, you know what, I don’t have the money to spend, or, that was fun. But I just want two pictures.” Those hard things that we experience teach us, there has to be a better way and we deserve to be paid before we pour our time, energy, and expertise into the project. 

I love that you do that. Then do you do prepayment plans as well, like before they do a shoot if someone wants to, space out their payments?

I use something kind of different. I don’t do prepayment versus a post payment. I mean, it is, but it’s not labeled that way. If people are  doing in-house payments, which very rarely I do that, I offer financing through a firm in Carna. There’s all sorts of different Paypal credit. If they do sign up for a payment plan, it depends on what package they want to pay off. If they want to pay off, let’s say my package too, that comes with I believe so essentially, you can do your session at any point in time in the next 12 months. If you want to book your session all the way out for like a year from now, or 11 months from now, I require you to start on a payment plan for that packet because that’s the smallest package that falls under that timeframe of payment. 

Normally if a client wants to do their session within three months of their consultation, there’s no requirement for a payment plan. But if they push out for four months, five months, six months, I’m lik, okay, now you’re falling into a payment plan timeframe, I need to get paid up front. If you want to book it out that far in advance, then you’re going to start payments today. I do that because I’ve had people who prepaid in just a thousand bucks, waited eight months to do their testing, and then they were like, “Oh well, I have other things coming up. I need to reschedule.” I’m like, “Okay, there’s a hundred cancellation fee.” They’re like, “I can’t afford that,” in return I say, “Well, then you’re going to leave your thousand dollars”, and they respond, “That’s fine.” I’m like, No, I need you to be making payments consistently or prepay this package if you’re going to schedule that fine advance. When that date comes, you’re not, “OH, well I sent that money eight months ago. It’s gone. It’s fine.”

The Entrepreneur Mindset and Artist Mindset

You states in part of your bio that you sent me, you said, “It’s important to have an entrepreneur mindset rather than an artist mindset.” What do you mean by that? 

Being in the boudoir photography industry, I’ve seen a lot of boudoir photographers going to know this through, there is a lot of drama, with people feeling so passionate about their ideas. I get it as artists, when we come up with an idea that’s our baby, we feel really like that’s something I created. Sometimes it does get to a point where it’s a little ridiculous. I saw one person post in a group a few years ago. They said, “I’m doing sessions with a crown and a blue robe. How do I tell them to stay in their lane?” I was like, “You don’t, because you don’t have a patent on seating with a blue robe and a crown.” You’re a business owner, why is this worth your time? This isn’t worth your time. You don’t see Chick-fil-A getting on Twitter, going after Popeyes because they came up with a chicken salad, and the sandwich is their thing. 

I think a lot of photographers, we get so wrapped up in artistic; I came up with this, it was my idea to start cheating with this setup. I had a photographer come ask me one time, because I did a similar theme at the same location. She also did and there was no ownership of anything. I was just something she did. I was like, that’s kind of cool. I want to try something kind of similar. I had a lot of photos that didn’t look similar. I think I had one photo where they screenshotted all my stuff. They tried to hurt my reputation and my thought process is as entrepreneurs, why were we worried about these things? This is not something we own. I could’ve called a lawyer because there was slanders. There was screenshotting my stuff, bad -mounting my company. I have people harassing me and I could’ve gotten a lawyer involved. He could not because I had done nothing wrong. 

I think a lot of artists get so passionate about feeling like they were wrong, when really they weren’t wrong in any way. This is such an ugly word, but entitlement to something that they came up with that is not something you could patent. It’s not something that you inherently own. It’s not something you can trademark. But they feel like nobody else can do this, because I did. That’s actually hurting your business and taking away from your business and taking time away from your pro charity. If you have something that you can sue over, if you have something that has really been done wrong to you, go act like an adult and go hire a lawyer. But if not they need to just stop focusing on this. Put your mindset back into your business. Put your mindset back into what’s going to make you money, and focus on that because you’re holding yourself back from your own abundance when you focus on things that are not going to affect you and are not hurting you, but you’re taking offense to them because of an ego trip or whatever. Entrepreneurs, they’re focused on collaboration. They’re focused on sharing. They’re not afraid to share ideas, spread, and build welsh. Artists are very territorial. They’re like, “This is mine, this is my thing.,” and we have to let go of that if we want to be successful. 

I totally agree with that. The word that kept coming up to me was scarcity, you know, the scarcity mindset. Like, I’m the only one who can do this. And now, it comes from that fear of not being good enough. I have to do something so different I claim is mine. That energy is taking away their prosperity, their joy, their abundance. I have to admit that I’ve noticed, because I left photography for two years and I went into coaching. When I went back to photography, I did feel a competitive edge from some other photographers, and it was very off putting. And having left the industry and then come back, I was like, Oh, wow, what is this? We’re here for a shootout. This was a free event that we all came to photograph. There was a little bit of bossiness, a little bit of competition, and I was like, are any of us getting paid for this? Isn’t this supposed to be fun? I think again because I had left and then came back to the industry and being a coach, there’s millions of us online and I don’t feel that competition. But being in that photography, I felt it again and it was disappointing. I think it is that there are so many photographers, and especially locally, I think that there can be a lot more collaboration that happens to support each other, and we all have something different to offer our energy, our present, the way we speak, the way we engage people, our style. I mean, there are so many differences that we all inherently have, that there is no scarcity. There’s more than enough for all of us. And what? If you’re not available and there’s another boudoir photographer down the street, you’re not going to refer them to her? There’s more than enough for all of us. I hope that the industry can see that there’s plenty for everyone. There’s no need to put another down or say that’s mine, or you can’t do it because I did that. All art is based on inspiration. You see something, you hear something and it inspires you. It’s the same thing with music, you rearrange the notes and create another son. It’s not about claiming that’s mine, I did it first, but recognizing and appreciating that all art is different. 

Challenges in the Field of Photography

I’d like to know what you think is more challenging for photographers? The sales or the marketing piece?

I feel like sales is harder. I know there’s a million photographers out there who keep marketing. We have model call, and there’s multiple people selling different versions of Model Call, different coaches. They’re selling basically the same thing. It’s just changed up a little bit. It’s basically, they’re teaching a marketing strategy and here’s how you do it and here’s how you target and run it on Facebook, run it on Tiktok, and that stufff is teachable it just depends if you’re going to sit there and listen to it and pay attention to it. I could go one on one with someone and just help them build their Facebook ad and then they kind of get it. I think marketing and learning how to market on itself is hard, because I paid for a Facebook ads course back in 017, because I knew nothing about Facebook ads. After paying for that course, that’s how I actually started advertising my first model call, by using my Facebook ads knowledge. I think marketing is hard to learn, but I think there’s so many practices out there that people have that, that’s cheesy. 

Sales is more intuitive, sales is more out of talk to people. And then there’s a lot of people who are still afraid of sounding like a salesperson, that they’re almost like, “I don’t wanna want to do sales, I don’t like sales.” There’s already a feeling in a lot of people. I don’t want to get close to that. I don’t want to be that salesperson. Marketing people don’t mind marketing sales. You already have a little bit of resistance from the people who are trying to learn it anyway. I think sales can be very difficult because you need to know how to build an offer and then how to present that offer. It’s a skill that it’s teachable, but there’s also something internal about. You have to know what way the adjustment should be made. Also legality, what can you legally do? Just offering a thousand dollars gift card, you know, offering a thousand dollars discount? There’s all this legal stuff you have to put it in. If you offer a gift card, there’s already a logged in place for gift cards. It’s a gift card, it’s nonrefundable. I don’t have to refund you with cash. If you’re prepaying me money for the gift card, I don’t have to refund you. Whereas if you put down a deposit or retainer and that person wants to push it far enough to take you to core, you might actually have to refund them. Knowing how you can build your offer and what you can put in place, the legalities of things. It’s very, I like sales because there is a bit of creativity to it. 

I remember my first sales job outside of college. Basically I was a glorified salesperson. We were like person to person marketing. We’d go to a dance club, we’d set up a booth for two weeks and we’d sell things like body massages, straighteners. And I had gone up to a leader and I had two people who were underneath me, we were all in a different area. We were in Waco and we were, you know, on a business trip, we were staying in hotels and we were working at the SAM Club in Waco, and they were selling something different than I was. We had two booths and I was right next to them, and I could see what they were doing. They were really struggling. They were really having a hard time getting people to stop and talk to them. What I did was I created a bingo board for them, and the bingo board was basically things they had to do while they were, and it was crazy things like they had to sing their pitch. They had to go up to a person and they had to tell a joke. They had to get them to come sit by, dealing a crazy dance, just all sorts of different things. Then as a bingo card, whoever got past it, the winner. They both started doing it and they got really into it, because now it was a game that was fun. Now, it was something different. It was making them more interesting. So customers were coming to talk to them and they were getting more people to sit down. Then when the game ended and they got out of it, they kind of got out of the sales again. They started losing their momentum. It’s definitely something you have to get creative with. You have to have fun with it. But if you’re already afraid of sales, if you’re already nervous about it, it’s gonna hurt you. You have to understand that you’re having a conversation with someone, you’re selling yourself, you’re selling fun,you’re selling joy. You have to be joyful. You can’t be scared.

Sales is fun, sales is creativity, sales is play, sales is game playing. It’s tuning into that energy because people respond to the energy and it’s like not the words you say, it’s how you feel about it. It’s an internal thing, so if you’re fearful and you’re literally pushing away sales, you could read a script, you could say exactly what your coach told you to say, and it’s not going to work because you’re not tuned into it and you’re fearful of it. It’s like you’re fearful and you do it anyway. Even if you are fearful, you practice, practice, practice, practice, practice. You keep doing it until it just becomes automatic. I have a friend who’s also a sales coach, and she says the price, and then she takes a sip of her drink and that way she’s not still talking. It’s like, shut up, you give the cost and then you shut up. I’ve done this before, I’ll jump right in, and we also have payment plans and then, or I’m like, just stop talking. The cost of the project is to take a sip of your drink and be quiet. And I’ve heard that too, that the person who talks the least makes the most. You gotta tune in to the person. What do they want? Tune into them and then offer what they want and show them what the experience can be like. 

Bonus Advice to Other People

What is the free gift that you have for other people? Can you tell us a little bit more about that? 

A free gift is really exciting. It is my contract breakdown template. A lot of photographers, and I did this, I struggled with this forever. They have the hardest time getting their clients to read their contract and actually like, know what they’re signing up for. Then throughout the entire process until photo delivery, they’re bombarded with texts and emails. They’re like, “Oh, I think I need to remind Julia. Oh, that.”  And it’s like, that’s against their policy. Then you have a client complaining, you’re like, well, it was a new contract. Well, I must have skipped that part, you know? And that’s, I see, needs all the time. We’ll just add that to the concept. Okay. But what can I do to get them to actually read the concept? 

My concept breakdown template is essentially a PowerPoint presentation, where you break down your contract into a PowerPoint presentation. I’’ve never heard of anything like this, but it’s so smart because the customer doesn’t want to read your damn contract. But obviously I didn’t read it because I don’t know it. And if they don’t know it, then it’s on you and then it’s awkward. 

What I used to do with my model call is as soon as they signed up for it, I plugged the information there, but I wanted them to sign a contract immediately because I wanted them in and locked in. And so what I did was I just made like a little video of me on Zoom presenting my PowerPoint presentation. It was like 12 minutes long and it’s literally just me breaking down my contract and then I’m like, click the button below, that’s where your actual contract is. It’ll have all the information on it. You can read it again if you want to get more in depth about all our policies, but like all the important stuff was in the content breakdown, no refund policy. All our money goes towards gift cards so that you, you know, it’s not a refund. If you cancel within two weeks, if it’s a $200 fee, you can’t come back later and say, “You didn’t know this.” You saw the video. 

It reminded me of a little cartoon, like a figure, like pointing things out and like, I don’t know. I’m getting this whole image of like, being in school and like one of the science cartoon team videos or something. That’s what reminds me. That’s brilliant and that serves the client and you, you know, and it’s all about being up upfront, forthcoming. We’re not trying to hide anything from them. We’re not trying to get more money. Like we’re, we’re being honest and forthcoming and educating them first, which is really good customer service.

Episode 36 – Success Begets Success

Success-Begets-Success-1

Listen to the full episode here.

In This Episode, You Will Learn About:

  • How can you shift your energy if you notice the momentum going the wrong way in your business?
  • How can you feel successful before the tangible evidence (money/new clients) arrive?
  • Why do the rich seem to get richer and the poor get poorer?

To learn more about how Julie can support you on the road to success, set up a call with her here.

About Julie Goetzinger:

Julie Goetzinger is a psychic medium, best-selling author and coach who teaches how to make more money and impact without sacrificing your well-being. In her book, “Free to Fly: Manifest the Life of Your Dreams,” she shares her story of how she created abundance by stepping into her true self as an artist and spiritual medium. She is the creator of Free to Fly and has seven years of experience in business as an entrepreneur.

Connect with Julie Goetzinger: 

Work with Julie

Get free training to learn how to make more money and impact without sacrificing your well-being

Website

Instagram

LinkedIn

Join Facebook Group

Follow on YouTube

Email: julie@juliegoetzinger.com

Keeping the Momentum

There goes this saying, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. Why is that? I have done some digging into that myself. I’ve played in both being rich, feeling rich, and feeling poor, being poor. I played with both as we do as entrepreneurs, right? And what I found was that advice was so freaking annoying when you’re in the depths of it and when the money is not rolling in and you know intuitively, but you don’t want to hear it, that everything is in response to you. 

This happened to me because I did have a dry period, and my coaches were like, “We’re not worried, like we know you and we know how resourceful and how creative you are. You’ve already had huge success. You can easily do it again.” And they were almost confused like why I was going through this dry spell and none of them seemed to be able to give me any advice other than, “We know you’re going to get out of it and we’re not going to worry about this.” It felt and I got chills on that. It was, like, annoying, but it was also the perfect gift because there was no pity. There was no like, “Oh, poor you.” It was like, why not? What are you doing? We know your capacity and what it was when the money wasn’t rolling in and when I felt like things weren’t working. 

It felt like it wasn’t what they weren’t, they actually were. What I was feeling was unworthy. I felt no one wanted to work with me. Nobody sees the value in what I do. I’m a mess. I’m not focused enough. I tore myself up during that period and what I realized was the more I felt that way, the more I felt like it’s just not working. I need to throw the talent and I should just cancel the whole thing. The more that people were repelled and they would come, but they wouldn’t pay me for whatever reason. They would say yes and then something would happen and they would never pay me. Things like that happened and it became like a pattern because the momentum can go in any direction. 

Momentum exists when things are going well and keep going well, and people keep booking, the money keeps coming, coming, and coming. And then the momentum and also go in the opposite direction and it is in response to you. But what I learned through that experience was it was a gift for me, that’s number one. So I would take the time to be more mindful of where I was putting my resources in my business and in my personal life. 

You know, did you really need to buy bottles of water that are pretty costly or can use a Brita? With simple things like that I had the opportunity to look into when resources and the terms of money weren’t flowing as much. So that was a gift, and also it was a deep dive within to really rediscover my worth for my existence here on earth. That feeling of, why am I here? It gave me the opportunity to really look at that. Why am I here? And had things continued to move in business during that time, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to really look within myself and to discover that I am not what I do. I am not what I look like I am. 

I am not what I physically say, or I am not those things, those are expressions of me, but my essence, my existence here on earth is what deems me worthy. And when you’re doing that inner work, sometimes the universe gives you the gift of cutting off other distractions, which be in the form of clients, our partners or friends, or it literally can put up a barrier between you all when you’re doing the inner healing work, which is what I found. 

And then, you know the expression that when the dam breaks and the floodgates open, they open. What I’ve done in my own business is set up multiple streams of revenue and I teach others how to do the same thing. But what I realized was that I was spending a lot of time building and my creative energy was really being utilized to develop these different programs, to enhance my retreat. 

To come up with my new creation, which is my VIP coaching day, was actually my favorite offering right now, where I map out someone’s entire coaching program and retreat in just half days’ time. I love it. It’s so fun. And that was born during this time and I was also not in partnership romantically with anyone at the time either. So all my creative energy and my power went towards building these different streams of revenue because it is very important to me that I create a legacy for my family, and that my children are not left wanting something that’s a basic need. Do I want them to learn the lessons I’ve learned? Ofcourse. 

I do not believe in just handing things to anyone, they will work, they will learn. And if they choose to have their own business, you know, I will help them create something, but it’s going to be on them to do it. No matter how much money I bring in, I always believe in the value of work and work where it feels like play. And I would never want to take away from them the feeling of accomplishment that comes when you build an empire and also when you overcome when things aren’t so good. It’s powerful, super powerful. 

As far as success, we get success. We often think that success is a lot of money coming in. Success is my body looking the way at once. Success is being in a healthy, loving, committed relationship. Those things can be success if you define those things as success, but you get to choose what success is and more important, what success feels like. Because if you can get into that feeling of success before the tangible evidence arrives, that is the key. 

Let me tell you, I know it is freaking hard when you do not feel successful to conjure up those feelings, and we don’t want to be inauthentic about it. You don’t want to pretend that there’s money in your bank account if there’s no money in your bank account. You do not want to be delusional, but what you do want to do is to shift your energy. That becomes the most important thing you focus on. How can I shift my energy to feel successful, to feel alive, to feel worthy? How can you shift your energy to feel that way? And it’s different for everyone. You know, often if we think back to what we did in childhood that really lit us up, that we decide as a little kid, I’m gonna do this for a career. 

There were no limitations at that time. Nobody, well, maybe you did have someone telling you couldn’t do it, but got back earlier than that. When you were a kid and you didn’t believe what adults asaid, you’re like, man grumpy adults, right? But as a kid, what did you want to do? I wanted to be a Broadway star. I wanted to be singing, I wanted to be dancing and be beautiful on stage. And what I started doing was the moth storytelling events. We have one in my area in Washington, DC and you volunteer to speak and to share a story based on that night’s theme. I’ve done it twice now, and both times afterwards, well actually that one time, it was  another breakthrough because I did not do well. That is for another podcast episode that I recorded, I think it’s called Worthy Check. But the next time I did it, the feeling of triumph, the feeling of success, the feeling of “Wow, I did that and it feels so good.”  That felt so good and there was no money involved with that. 

That was a personal success because I chose to put myself out there. I chose to share a personal story. I chose to be brave. I chose to inspire others with my story and my messaging and my courage, and that to me is success. I started doing more things like that, and then I started doing outdoor photoshoots again because it makes me feel alive and it makes me feel in my creative flow. It makes me feel just like, yes, like I’m in love with life. 

That is a shift right there because I felt that and I just felt it. Again, thinking about it, talking about it, brings it right back. Those feelings, like I could do this forever. Have no idea what time it is. I have no idea how much money I’m gonna make from this, if any. And it doesn’t matter because this feels so good at this moment. 

I just want to soak up this moment. I just wanna talk about this for as long as possible. Tell as many people as possible how good this feels and celebrate this. I’m going to write it down in my journal. I’m going to talk about it. I’m going to record it on my phone. I’m going to make a podcast episode about it. I’m going to write about it in my blog, like really getting into that energy. Is like that magnet, that’s like, whew!

Valuing Commitment

People feel that and they want to get it on that. I want some of what she’s having, right? It’s like that feeling. So how can you allow yourself to feel that before any evidence arrives to feel that wake form? Something I’ve practiced doing is, in the past, I have phone calls with people who are considering working with me through coaching or photography, and in the past I would get really high and excited after I got that.

Sometimes it was before they paid or signed a contract, which I learned not to do. You know, like when they don’t pay you or change their minds. But I’ve learned to be easier about and to just think, of course they want to do this, why wouldn’t they want to do this with me?

I’m fun to be with, I create beautiful photos, I create beautiful experiences. I’m good at business. I know these things about myself, and I’m willing to feel that and to know that. And to separate myself from the result of how another, what another decides to do. Not making it about me. Do they value me? Do they value my work? Are they going to pay me? But the more I know the value of this, the right person is going to be so excited. 

I just had a photographer sign up for a VIP coaching day with me and paid in full. She had no doubt at all, no doubt in her mind, and she was like, absolutely, this is perfect. This is exactly what I want to do. I’m hosting a retreat in January and I really want to work with you and learn how to make that a really great experience. So I also sent her a welcome package, her workbook, and told her a little bit about what to expect. And she writes me back and says, “I feel so much better.”

She just knew that this was what she needed to make for herself. She felt that trust with me. She was able to relax and to know that this was her next step and what a gift. And that feels good to both of us because now I know that she’s already ready and just because she paid in full. That does show commitment. The fact she said, I feel so much better already, and that’s before we even done any of the work. That’s how I know it’s going to work for her because she already believes that it will. She already trusts, she’s already open, and she’s already coachable. She’s already ready, let’s go! 

That is so rewarding to me as well as the coach of having someone that’s like sure and committed. And if I have someone that’s not sure, it’s not going to be a really great experience for either of us. If they’re not ready, if they’re not ready to be coached, or if they’re not ready to spend the money, or if they’re not ready to get started on this, it’s really not going to be enjoyable for either of us or worthwhile. 

So we want to allow those people to fall away easily if they’re not ready yet. If it’s a photoshoot and they want to lose weight, or for some instance, I just had someone say he wanted to grow out his hair. Cool. Who am I to say, no you’re perfect the way you are. Do I believe that perfection is in the eye of the beholder? If they don’t feel good and comfortable and they want to do something about that, who am I to tell them not to? Same with money, if they’re not comfortable spending the money, who am I to convince them that they should be comfortable that this is worth it? No, I want them to arrive at that on their own. 

It’s just like if someone has an addiction and you sign them up for AA or something, it’s not going to work. They need to feel the inspiration. They need to, and if you look at it the other way, they need to convince you that they’re willing to be modeled and tested. Because something like a bir photoshoot is deeply intimate. It’s personal exposure. So you want them to show you that they’re ready for this, they’re ready for this level of exposure, they’re ready for this level of trust. Same things in coaching, same things in any area of your expertise.

You want people who are ready for what you have to offer, and then your job is to show up at your fullest to take really good care of yourself, so that you can serve them to your highest capacity as well. If you are interested in learning how to work with me on a deeper level, if you’re interested in setting up multiple streams of revenue for your business, hosting retreats, adding coaches services, online programs, I am happy to help you. 

Episode 34 – Growth Through Failure

Growth Through Failure

In this episode, Julie shares how being willing to fail can lead to your greatest triumphs in life.  When we spend so much of our lives trying to avoid failure we are limiting our highest growth potential because in the depths of failure is when the greatest lessons are learned and our true strengthening happens.  Getting curious about our desire to “win” and learning to let that go will allow us to experience the true joy and bliss that can happen when we try new things and don’t let the fear of failure stand in our way.

In This Episode, You Will Learn About:

  • How failing can be the greatest thing that happens for your growth
  • How to let go of the fear of failure
  • Having courage to put yourself out there in a new way is what will lead to your greatest triumphs in life


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About Julie Goetzinger:

Julie Goetzinger is a psychic medium, best-selling author and coach who teaches how to make more money and impact without sacrificing your well-being. In her book, “Free to Fly: Manifest the Life of Your Dreams,” she shares her story of how she created abundance by stepping into her true self as an artist and spiritual medium. She is the creator of Free to Fly and has seven years of experience in business as an entrepreneur.

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Performing at the Moth

Recently, I went and performed a story at The Moth. The Moth is for storytellers, many of which are professional speakers, actors, actresses coming to perfect their craft.  And I decided, being trained as a professional speaker, this would be something that’s great for me, to get in front of an audience and to practice a story. I signed up to put my name in to be pooled. And what happens is you’re to prepare a five minute talk on a specific theme.

The theme that night was crossroads.  So we were asked to prepare a five minute talk, and you don’t know if you’re gonna get chosen when you get there. You put your name in the bag and that just means that you’re open to being chosen.  I came in cocky as hell and I left deeply humbled. 

Here’s what happened:  I walked in and I’m like, “I got this. I’m a speaker. I’ve got a speaking coach. I’ve got a rating coach. I can do this. I’m not afraid.” I introduced myself to the staff. I sat near the VIPs. I saw their seats marked VIP, and I decided I would make friends with the VIPs because I, too, am a VIP, and I deserve to be here in this section. Again, feeling cocky, feeling confident. And cocky to me just means overconfident.

It was just how I was at the beginning of that night,  and I made friends with this woman who actually had won the event the previous time. So we exchanged phone numbers because I figured it’d be good to know her. And she also just thought it was fun to connect with me. So we exchanged phone numbers. She is the first person to get picked to share, and she does an incredible job, and I’m so proud of my new friend. She gets good scores and that was something else. I didn’t realize that we were even being scored. I thought that we were just going up there, kind of like karaoke, and just share our story from our hearts. You know, kind of like improv.

Well, no, there’s a specific criteria that you’re to follow. It’s supposed to be timed and you are judged and you get scores.  I was like, “Oh, okay, well, if I’m meant to get picked, I get picked. If I’m not, I won’t. No big deal, right?” My name is called next. I’m like, “Oh shit. Too late to turn back.” Now, I walk out on stage loosely having a story that I wanted to share about divorce and had no idea how long the story was gonna be.

I was proud of my story because my message was about divorce as completion.  It was about not to fear it, not to think you’re bad or wrong, or to shame yourself for going through divorce or for considering divorce, but to see it as completion and to continue to send that person love and appreciation after the separation.

So I finished my story. I just stopped. There was no real ending. I just stopped talking.  I had no idea how long I’d been talking. The audience applauds me. I go and sit down and my scores pop up. They’re low. They’re pretty low, and I’m thinking, “Well, I didn’t know what I was doing. It’s fine. At least I got up there and shared my story. It’s okay.”  The next person gets up there, her scores are much higher than mine. The next person gets up there, their scores are also higher than mine, to the point where my name just kept dropping lower and lower in that scoreboard. I’m sitting there feeling like I’m gonna explode with tears, fighting them back. Just feeling all the feelings that I have no right to be here. Who am I to be a speaker? I need to pick something else. I can never do this professionally. Who would pay me for this when I just got that score? I don’t deserve to be here. The lights finally came on during intermission and I did not say goodbye to any of my new friends. I beline it the hell out of there. I fast walk to the metro, get to the metro. Two people ask me for money, and I’m thinking, “Well now I’m gonna get robbed after just being kicked down, being told I wasn’t good enough, basically by a huge audience of people that I’ve never even met.” Finally I get home and I cry myself to sleep.

Realizations after the Failure

I wake up the next morning wanting to blame someone for these feelings. These feelings of inferiority, these feelings of failure. And I’m thinking, they shouldn’t have judged you. They shouldn’t have given scores. That was humiliating. I will never step foot in the Miracle Theater again. And then I got curious and I started thinking, what part of me has such a strong desire to win? Why? 

I thought back in my life to other times when I had won and lost and what happened, and what I recalled was if I would score the winning goal in soccer or if I would get chosen for a part in the play in my school auditions, then, I would receive a lot of love from my father. And my dad was a performer as well, and I was thinking, this is his arena. I can’t let dad down. My dad has now departed. I was thinking, “Wow, I really let dad down.” And I think subconsciously that was actually what I was responding to. Not my scores, but what it meant and how it made me feel. I realized that winning was actually me putting myself out there saying yes to allowing myself to be someone who shared a story in hopes of inspiring and uplifting others.

Maybe someone in the audience was going through a divorce right then, or was about to, and was fearful and needed to hear my message not to be afraid. That was why I shared that, not to get good scores. And then I started thinking, how is this any different than getting crappy scores in mini golf? Why does this matter so much?

And I realized that it was the being stuck in this idea of what success looks like. Success looks like lots of money. Success looks like high scores. Success looks like praise from others. So, as long as we need that feeling and that validation from others, we will never feel success within. The success here is in putting ourselves out there of being bold and being brave. Having the desire to inspire and to help and to teach others, that is success. 

And that is my story of how I was humbled, yet was also able to pick myself back up and grow through this perceived failure and to not see it as a failure at all. I also realized that the name of the theater was The Miracle Theater, and I laughed about that because of the breakthrough that I experienced in the Miracle Theater.

This is the exact story that I plan to share at the next month’s event. I’m not shying away. I’m not hiding. I’m not staying home feeling sorry for myself. I’m gonna put myself out there again only one month after having that happen. That is success. That is winning.